Grieving

Last night was rough, Rebecca has started the grieving process. We knew it was coming, but it is never easy. As with most children, it begins at bedtime. We fed her a bottle and laid her down in her crib and at first she was just real restless and chattering (baby jibber jabber), I left her in the crib thinking she would settle herself and fall asleep. But then the screaming started so I jumped up and picked her up and held her tight, rocked her, and talked to her. She recoiled at my touch, arched her back and began beating herself on the face with her own hands. I then had to hold her precious little arms down so that she wouldn't hurt herself. We both cried and cried. In all it probably lasted about 2 hours and she fell asleep in my arms and I let her sleep in the bed with me. She slept soundly. As I was sitting on the bed rocking my screaming baby it reminded me of how we treat God and the treasure, the abundant life He offers. Our Heavenly Father is bidding us, "Come to me and I will give you rest." yet something in us makes us look back at the filth that He is delivering us from and we want  the filth more than we want His blessings, His adoption, His love.

This morning she is pretty much back to her happy self, she cried a little this morning. We are about to head down to the lobby for the free breakfast buffet. This evening we will fly to Guangzhou and tomorrow she will have a medical exam and TB test. Monday we will have the TB test read.  Tuesday is our VISA application appointment at the US Consulate where we will apply for Rebecca's VISA. Then Wednesday we will go back to the Embassy and pick up her VISA, hire a van to take us back to Hong Kong and Thursday morning we will leave Hong Kong for Chicago. 

Please continue to pray for our precious wonton!

More details...

Now that I am fully rested, I will explain in further detail Rebecca's Gotcha Day.

Our flight from Hong Kong to Zhengzhou arrived on time (around 2:30 pm - remember we are 13 hours ahead of Spartanburg). We made it through Immigration and Customs with out any problems which I believe was a miracle and an answer to prayer. People all around us were having their bags searched and we walked right on through. Not that we had anything bad in our bags, but one was full of baby food for Rebecca that we were afraid might get confiscated. Our guide was waiting for us and had a driver waiting as well. We hopped into the van and drove about 45 minutes to the Zhengzhou's city center. As with most other foreign countries, traffic was crazy and I was so happy someone else was doing the driving. We arrived at the Provincial Affairs building and guess who was waiting for us inside??? Yes, Rebecca. She was very sleepy (she had a 3 hour car ride from her orphanage) and hungry. So, I got to hold her while she took her bottle. Those first few moments with her were overwhelming. I smiled, I cried, I just stared at her. We had to fill out and sign a ton of paperwork giving us guardianship of her. After we left the Provincial Affairs office we got back into the van, with Rebecca in tow this time, and headed to our hotel. We are staying at the Ramada Plaza and it is really nice. While we were getting settled into our room, our guide went on a grocery store run to find more formula for Rebecca. Her main source of food is still a bottle so she gets a bottle just about every 2 1/2 hours. The orphanage, of course, tries to supplement with soft, mushy foods too. So, all that to say, she needs ALOT of formula.

Right now it is 7:00 am in Zhengzhou and precious Rebecca just woke up. She slept very soundly last night. So far the only time she has cried is when she is hungry. Bucky is giving her a bottle as I type. Today we will go back to the Provincial Affairs office and sign the adoption degree, changing Cai Yin Dang - orphan to Rebecca Eden Rogers - daughter. 

If anyone reading this has some time on their hands to do a little research for me (can't do alot of Internet surfing here in China) would you mind to research some practical ways we can help Rebecca cope with her self stimulation habits. Because she was left in a crib without much outside stimuli, she has some self stimulation habits (like shaking her head no frequently). We know that these can't be corrected overnight, but we would be interested in what the "experts" have to say about it and some ideas of how we can begin helping her through those things. Thanks! If you would, please e-mail any finding to juliefaithrogers@yahoo.com

HAPPY GOTCHA DAY!!!!

Rebecca is absolutely precious! Her laugh will melt your heart. So far she has transitioned amazingly, however, bedtime often is the hardest so we will wait and see. Please continue to pray for us as she does have some significant developmental delays as well as signs of neglect. I am not at all saying that I think anyone was mean to her, but the orphanage could not provide her with the one on one care she needs. Tomorrow we will begin all the legal stuff which means paperwork, paperwork, paperwork. I can not figure out how to post pictures to my blog from China, so we are going to e-mail the pictures to someone and have them post them on Facebook for us. We love you all!

I meant for this to post yesterday... Hello friends and family, Right now, in Hong Kong,  it is 7:20 am. Bucky and I endured the grueling 14 1/2 hour flight from Newark to Hong Kong and so far everything has gone according to plan: all of our flights were on time, the food was good and ALL of our luggage made it Hong Kong. Our flight landed last night around 7:30 pm and by 10 we were fast asleep, however, we have been up since 5 am. So, I imagine we will be napping later. We miss our children terribly, but I am so glad they (the littles especially) were not with us during that long flight. I am getting daily email updates from Bucky's mom and Xan and Brennan are having a blast! Well, tomorrow is the BIG day, the one we have been waiting for. We will fly to Zhengzhou, which is about a 2 hour flight from Hong Kong, and receive Rebecca at our hotel. I still can't believe this is all happening. Thank you for your prayers!

Prayer Requests

I know many of you will be praying for us as we go to China. Here are some specific thing:

Xan and Brennan:

-that they will sleep well while they are away from home

-that God will comfort them when they are missing mama and papa.

-that they would have so much fun with their grandparents that they won't have much time to miss us.

-for God's protection and safety while me and Bucky are so far away.

Sasha:

-that he will be able to keep his grades up and not get overwhelmed with school

-for God's protection and safety

-that he will rest well and be ready for school

-that he will have a wonderful time with the Drake's.

Bucky and Julie:

-safe and peaceful flights

-that we will stay healthy

-that God might give opportunities to share our faith while we are away

-patience, love and long suffering if Rebecca has a hard time with the transition

-that we would be able to win Rebecca's affection quickly

-that God would give us special discernment regarding her special needs and how to care for them

-that God would keep a snow storm from hitting Chicago anytime around Feb. 8th and 9th

-that we would be able to get through Immigration in Chicago on the 9th quickly in order to make our flight home

Rebecca:

We really have no idea what to expect here...

-Her emotions after being taken from all she has ever known and left with strangers

-her health

-for her to sleep peacefully and adjust to USA time quickly once we get home

Thank you for praying!

The Emotional Roller Coaster I have experienced so many emotions this past month and half. I remember right around Christmas standing in my kitchen and saying out loud, "God I really hate your timing. I think it stinks." I can hear the gasp come out of your mouth as you read that, haha! But alas, I am human and people all around me (in the adoption world) were getting their travel approvals and I was not. My baby girl is across the ocean in an orphanage with no heat and I became quite angry with God's timing. I have since thanked God for not giving me a swift kick in the butt and for being patient with me, a sinner. He is a big God and he can handle my honesty and gently guide me back to loving His providence. He is good! Once receiving our travel approval my emotions slowed down because I was so consumed with flights, hotels, paperwork, etc. Yesterday, I jumped back on the coaster. One minute I was so excited about leaving for China and the next I was so sad about leaving my boys. Last night while on a date with my wonderful husband, the first tear fell. I am going to miss my boys so much. I have no doubt that their grandparents and the Drake's are going to take very good care of them and that they are going to have so much fun, but I feel like my heart is being ripped out of my body. I have never been away from them for more than 2 nights. I have warned Bucky that I will likely cry all the way home from dropping our kids off with his parents in Tennessee next Saturday. I will be counting down the days until we can get to Rebecca's province then Skype with the boys and introduce them to their new sister.

We Are Going To CHINA!!!! We have received our travel approval and scheduled our consulate appointment. Rebecca's Gotcha Day is February 2 and we are so excited to finally have her in our arms.