and still no birth certificate. I think the Louisiana Vital Records office has my number blocked because I called AGAIN today and it went straight to voice mail. I normally get to speak to a person. The voice mail message said to leave a message and they would call me back soon. They didn't call today. Makes you wonder what "soon" means to the government.
My sweet husband went and got us pizza because I am too sad and depressed to cook. He also mentioned that God must be trying to teach us something with this wait. And to be honest my response was to scream (inwardly I might add), "I HATE LESSONS! I DON'T WANT ANY MORE LESSONS! JUST GIVE ME THE DANG BIRTH CERTIFICATE! DANG IT!" Honestly that is how I feel right now, I don't want to learn anything, I want this to be easy. I just want to go get my son. I am finding myself running from God and telling Him, "No, I don't want You. You are hurting me and I hate it." I am running from what I know I need the most...the peace and rest of my Savior's arms.
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2 comments:
Julie, I appreciate your honesty. You are so real. We, too, are in the middle of waiting and I DON'T LIKE IT. I can't fathom waiting for your child, though. I love that God can handle when we question "why" and "how much longer?"
I can not imagine the frustration you are feeling!
Praying that you do not have to wait much longer.
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